Well, that was ugly. In a family affair, Peyton Manning's Colts decimated Eli Manning's Giants, 38-14. With the Manning parents watching, it was hard to imagine why Archie didn't jump on the field and threaten to send both brothers to their room as a merciful father.
The massacre called to mind other famous brother routs throughout history:
1. Peyton over Eli Manning: This has the top spot. Peyton posted a 145.5 QB rating, completing 20-of-26 passes for 255 yards, three touchdowns, and no interceptions. While Eli's stats look superficially decent-161 yards, 2 TDs, 1 INT- most of the damage came long after the outcome had been decided. Add the huge edge Peyton holds in awesome SNL skits, and this one isn't even close.
2. Cain over Abel
This one had a similar spread to Peyton vs. Eli, with one brother clearly holding an edge based on a prime-time performance. Was Peyton motivated by Archie's favoring Eli, as it is suspected was Cain's reason? Other parallels include the fact that Archie was exiled from the Garden of Eden that is the Super Bowl for wearing certain clothes. In Adam's case, it was clothes themselves; for Archie, it was wearing the gold of the New Orleans Saints.
3. Hank Aaron over Tommie Aaron
Which brothers have hit the most home runs? Why, the Aarons, of course. Hank has 755; Tommie has 13. 13! One can only imagine the bragging rights that engendered at family functions. Like Hank, Peyton will have an argument as one of the greatest ever to play his position. Tommie/Eli? Not so much.
4. Gob Bluth over Buster Bluth
Let's see, edges Gob had: better theme song (The Final Countdown to Buster saying, "Hey Brother!"), won Marta's heart, took Liza Minelli from Buster. But the clear Peyton/Eli comparison comes from the episode of Arrested Development where Gob punches Buster as he comes down the slide so the next time he does it, he won't be afraid. Last night's game was a slide-and-stomach-punch moment for Eli.
5. Greg Maddux over Mike Maddux
Greg Maddux: 355 wins. Mike Maddux: 39 wins. Last night's game was the Maddux careers, put into four quarters. Need I say more?